How To Ask A Girl Out On A Date
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>>>>QUESTION FROM A READER:
What and when are the best time and way to ask a girl for a
date? A lot of my friends tell me that the best way is to become a
friend with her at first and then to try to “deepen” the
realtinship. But what I do is when I meet a girl that I am
intersted in, I ask her out if not immediately, I do it the day
after. And I always get rejected.
What do u think?
Ivan
>>>>MY RESPONSE
Well, there’s a definite school of thought for both sides of that
argument. But in a way, I think it’s a loaded question. But I’ll
try to answer it the best I can.
What this really depends on is the type of girl you’re going after
and the manner in which you ask her out.
So we’ll tackle the first part now:
The Type Of Girl
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Okay, now when I say “type of girl,” I’m not talking about who she
is (blonde, brunette, 5’7 tall, etc.). I’m talking about how INTO
you she is.
See, if a girl likes you, it doesn’t matter when you ask her out.
She’s going to say YES.
But if she’s on the fence, ambivalent to you, or maybe not all that
attracted to you (yet), she may need a little more time for you to
“work your magic” on her before she’ll agree to go out with you.
So before you ask a girl out, try to figure out where she’s at on
the “I’m Into You” spectrum. It WILL affect your outcome.
Now onto the second part:
The Way You Ask Her Out
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This is very important, because it’s where most guys make a
mistake. There is a certain strategy to asking a girl out that can
be succesful 99% of the time, and I’ll share it with you right here.
Regardless of whether she’s into you or not, it’s important that
you display your desire for her. Now, I’m not saying you have to be
drooling all over her in lust — but I am saying you need to FLIRT
with her.
Flirting is important because it will subcommunicate your
intentions. Too often, men will hide the fact they like a girl, and
then when they do finally ask her out, the girl is surprised and
scared because it seemed to have come out of left field.
When you flirt with a girl, what you’re doing is “priming the pump”
for the date. So when you DO ask her out, she’s ready for it and in
some ways, expecting it. This will totally bypass that “Shocked
deer in headlights” look most women will give you when they’re
suddenly asked out by a guy.
When you try befriending a girl first, you run the risk of getting
pegged in that dreaded “let’s just be friends” category. But if
you’re flirtatious and the girl knows your intentions (even if its
on a subconscious level), you will be able to avoid that pitfall
because you’re making it clear from the beginning that you want to
be more than just friends. So if the girl you’re working on
requires more time, do the work, but don’t completely cloak your
intentions.
Also, don’t do the “Would you like to go out sometime?” line to ask
a girl out. That’s a TOTALLY loaded question because it instantly
snaps her into the “dating” mindset.
You may want to date a girl, but you don’t want it to FEEL like
dating, because there are all sorts of preconcieved notions about
dating that can work against you in the long run.
When you ask a girl out, try doing it indirectly. Saying something
like “Hey, I’m going to this great concert (or movie, or bar, or
whatever) tommorrow night. Why don’t you come along?” or “Hey, what
are you doing for dinner on Thursday? I know this great place that
I think you’d love!”
When you ask a girl out like this, you are, in fact, asking her out
on a date, but you’re bypassing all the “expectations” of dating.
It helps keep things light and fun while getting you the same result.
If you want to know more about how to tell if a girl is into you,
how to effectively flirt with a girl, and how to ask a girl out on
a date, you should definitely check out my book, The Art Of
Approaching. I go into great detail on all the preliminary steps
you need to take to get the women you want.
If you haven’t gotten my book yet, what are you waiting for? The
time to learn how to get more women is now! Click below to download
your copy today:
http://artofapproaching.onfasttrack.com/main.html?ar=32bc
And if you REALLY want to supercharge your success with women,
be sure to take a look at my Advanced Course here:
http://artofapproaching.onfasttrack.com/products/multimedia.html?ar=32mm
Good luck! Happy dating!
Joseph Matthews
P.S. If you have a success story you would like to share, or a
question you would like to ask, or a comment you would like to
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