How To Destroy Shyness, Step-By-Step
How To Destroy Shyness, Step-By-Step
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>>>Question from a painfully shy guy:
Hi Joe,
Your newsletters are wonderful. Hats off to you man.
The biggest problem I face is loneliness. I like this girl who
lives in my apartment building, but I can’t talk to her because
I’m too shy.
It’s like this with everyone. I don’t even have any friends
because I’m too shy to meet people. And when I talk to girls, I
don’t get the responses I want because I get too nervous and don’t
know what to say.
The other day, I ran into the girl from my apartment building. By
luck she was waiting for the elevator when I came in and there was
no one else around to make me nervous.
She is so beautiful. Seeing my chance, I used one of your tips and
started to look at her eyes and try to make eye contact, but she
looked to the side so I couldn’t even see her face.
When she did this, I got nervous and took the stairs instead of
waiting for the elevator with her.
When I read your emails, I get a lot of courage. It took a great
deal of daring on my part to even look at the eyes of this girl.
Because I’m too shy to have friends who can help give me advice on
this, and because my attempt at meeting this girl went poorly, I’m
horribly depressed.
I’m writing to you with a very badly wounded in my heart. Help me!
What can I do?
Waiting for your advice…
With regards,
Ray
>>>My Response:
First off, I just want to point out that you are putting WAY too
much importance on women.
Way, WAY too much.
It sounds like you are rejecting yourself in your mind before they
have a chance to get to know you.
See, for guys who don’t know a lot about women, they seem to be
something more than just another human being.
They are the source of sexual pleasure.
They are the source of validation.
They are special.
If you have ever had the thought “If only I could get a girl to
like me, everything would be different!” …
Then you have some very unrealistic views about the opposite sex.
Here’s the funny thing…
You weren’t BORN shy.
Shyness is not an inherited trait.
It’s something that is LEARNED.
It’s a skill that is DEVELOPED over time.
In short: Shyness is UNNATURAL!
Human beings, by nature, are social creatures. We’re raised by
parents, have siblings, etc., so it’s natural to desire contact
with other human beings.
Any feelings that make you act contrary to this desire are contrary
to evolution.
They are DANGEROUS!
They are trying to deprive you of a basic human need — contact
with others.
When you fall back on the crutch of being “shy,” what you’re really
doing is training yourself to do something that’s inherently
HARMFUL to you!
Being afraid of others is the equivalent of having an irrational
fear of food. Food is something you NEED to survive! And if
you’re afraid of it, you’re going to suffer.
In this case, if you were dying of hunger because you’re afraid of
food, would you rather die of starvation, or would you prefer to
FORCE yourself to eat, despite the fear, in order to survive?
This is the same dilemma you must face when confronting shyness.
Would you rather suffer emotionally from loneliness and fear?
Or would you rather force yourself through the fear and enjoy human
companionship?
I’m hoping you choose to FIGHT the fear.
And I’ll help you do it.
Do you want to know the single best way to overcome shyness?
You can do it by simply MEETING PEOPLE.
Keep reading, because I’m going to tell you, step-by-step, what you
have to do.
Go out EVERY DAY to meet 10 women. It doesn’t matter what they
look like, how old they are, whatever, as long as they are WOMEN.
Walk up to them and say:
“Excuse me, can I ask you a question? It will only take a moment.”
If they say “No thanks,” just shrug it off and say “Well, thanks
for your time.”
If they say “Yes,” respond:
“I need some female advice on something. My little cousin’s (or
niece, or whatever) birthday is coming up, and I need to get her a
gift, but I don’t know what little girls would like. Can you give
me a recommendation?”
Then when they give you the answer, say:
“Thank you very much. My name is (your name). What’s yours?”
When they give you their name, end it with:
“It was a pleasure meeting you (her name). Thanks for the advice.”
And then WALK AWAY.
That’s right. You don’t have to hang around and chit-chat. You
can just walk away.
Simple, right?
You might be afraid to do this at first, but just remember that
you’re only asking them a QUESTION.
Nothing more.
You’re not trying to get a phone number or a date. You’re just
trying to break through your barrier about meeting others.
In short: You’re re-training yourself to fight through your shyness!
Do this to 10 women every day. You’re not asking them out or
anything, you’re just asking a question and introducing yourself.
If you keep doing this, you’re going to notice a few things:
1. Meeting people isn’t scary. In fact, it can be rather fun!
2. Most people will want to be engaged in conversation, and may
even ask you questions or try to engage you in a
conversation in return.
3. The people who don’t want to talk to you aren’t worth your
time. It’s the ones who DO want to talk to you who are
worth while.
Now, this is only part of the solution to finally overcoming your
shyness for good.
For a complete run-down of how to build your confidence and conquer
your shyness forever, you simply must, must, MUST check out my
revolutionary ebook The Art Of Approaching.
In it, I break down the act of confidence building in such a way,
even a three year old infant could follow it.
And what’s even more is — IT WORKS!
Don’t believe me? Download the book right now and see for yourself:
http://artofapproaching.onfasttrack.com/main.html?ar=39bc
Remember that I offer a full money-back guarantee on my product,
because I know that what’s in it will work well for you! I stand
by my teachings 100%. So if you get my book and decide it’s not
for you, you can get your money back — no qu*estions asked!
There is *no* risk on your part. Either you improve, or you get a
refund.
I guarantee it!
And if you REALLY want to supercharge your success with women,
be sure to take a look at my Advanced Course here:
http://artofapproaching.onfasttrack.com/products/multimedia.html?ar=39mm
Wishing you success,
Joseph Matthews
P.S. If you have a success story you would like to share, or a
question you would like to ask, or a comment you would like to
make, please email me at:
questions@artofapproaching.com
Include your first name and include the country, state/province,
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I love to hear from my customers because I can learn just as much
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